Friday, June 29, 2007

The whole country should have done this in 2000

How we become American


From Peggy Noonan.

Sure she used to write for Ronnie Reagan. Sure she was a raging alcoholic for years. But she does know how to write.

Here is a quote:

This is the way it goes in America. You start as the Outsider and wind up the Insider, or at least being viewed as such by the newest Outsiders. We are a nation of still-startling social fluidity. Anyone can become "American," but they have to want to first.


Read the whole damn thing. If you have time to look at this stupid blog you have time to read this column.

Quote for the Day!


From Andrew Sullivan.

This is so good I had to repost in its entirety.

"He firmly believed that everything he did was right, that he ought on all occasions to have his own way -- and like the sting of a wasp or serpent his hatred rushed out armed and poisonous against anything like opposition. He was proud of his hatred as of everything else. Always to be right, always to trample forward, and never to doubt, are not these the great qualities with which dullness takes lead in the world?" - William Makepeace Thackeray,

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Monday, June 25, 2007

Reposted here due to absolutely no demand



This was referenced on the BPN board but since the website WhattheHelen.com is now in hiatus I found it in google "cache" and reposted it here.

Friday, June 1, 2007
Report from the Front Line of the New Aldi



First, I did the unthinkable. I went into Aldi during the middle of the day when crowds are at their weekday maximum. I did this for you dear readers. Normally, I would walk over there 15 minutes before closing and zip through when there were no crowds. I do the same thing at Jewel. Because the only thing that bothers me more than a varmint is a crowd in front of me at a checkout line.

Here are my observations in no logical order:

1. Hot woman behind me in the checkout line. Rowr. She had two kids with her. Oh well, easy come easy go.

2. Aisles are wider.

3. Garbage can near the entrance to the Aldi, in the back of the building, was already overflowing.

4. Two security guards as opposed to the one I have observed there before.

5. Brighter lighting.

6. Goods are stacked better because of the wider aisles.

7. The sidewalk leading to the entrance of the Aldi, in the back of the building, is wide enough for people to go in both directions with grocery carts in hand simultaneously. Don't try it with more than two people in opposite directions, though.

8. More checkout lines. Although only two were in use.

9. Some people do not get the "concept" of "sidewalk". People were entering and exiting to Broadway using the vehicular traffic entrance/exit. Who woulda thunkit.

10. This just came to me as I'm typing and eating. Snickers candy bars are proof that God exists and that she loves us. Thank you Aldi for your fine selection of chocolate items.

For more fun Aldi coverage check out my ARCHRIVALS over at da Uptown Update.

Thursday, June 21, 2007

"Hollywood Chicago" found my video

Hollywood Chicago.

Oh well. I purposefully left out any references in the description of the video to "Batman" because I figured anyone not from the neighborhood might not "git" the references to "Hookers" or "Kent the Big Gay Dog Walker". The hookers are/were real and Kent is a real person who goes by that nom de guerre.

I guess those who are "film geeks" appreciate any video no matter how badly done.

Of course I go to "The Music Box" Theatre for 11:30 am screenings of John Wayne movies so who am I calling a film geek! By the way "The Searchers" and "Red River" are coming up soon. Check out their website. "Da Music Box"

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Only a rooster can get a better piece of chicken than Jake's


Jake's "Pup in the Ruff" is a neighborhood institution. Particularly among the neighborhood institutionalized and glitterati. Like me, da IrishPirate.

Jake's is located at da NE corner of Sheridan and Montrose. Phone ahead for quick pick up. 773-728-1188. Family owned and operated. "Chicken Eaters paradise since 1959".

Their chicken is broasted and I have never had a better piece of chicken than Jake's. Not every time. Mostly it is above average, but every once in awhile God looks down upon me and puts a heavenly piece of bird in the bunch.

If you get the 4 piece special, under $7.00 with tax, you get 4 pieces of chicken, corn on da cob, freedom fries,(I mean french fries but I want to mock the "right wing)bread, butter, a moist towelette and cole slaw. YUMMY.

Jake's also has a fine selection of fish and meat selections to include, but not limited to: polish sausage, burgers, Italian beef, vienna beef hot doggies, and corn dogs. Add in the normal breakfast items, shakes, sundaes, and appetizers and you could eat there 3 times a day.

The customers are a true Uptown mix. Think Edward Hopper's "NightHawks" meets Uptown and takes a hit of LSD. If you are looking for a place to be reviewed in an imaginary Uptown "Check Please" this ain't it. It is a place to get good, reasonably priced and quick food. You can eat in, you can eat outside, or like me you can call ahead and pick it up.

In many ways Jake's seems to operate as a social gathering place for many of the people who live nearby who don't own condos or rent more expensive apartments. It is a glimpse of Uptown past and present. More importantly........da food is good.

The owner or his son seem to be there daily and the employees are mostly long term and know how to cook. It's a neighborhood institution. Check it out and tell them da pirate sent ya!

Friday, June 15, 2007

Obama Girl

Besides being damn sexy this video is amusing. The idea that someone would support someone for Prez because they find them "hot" amuses me. As it amused the makers of this video.

Years ago, when the buffalo walked the plains, I had a friend who wanted Miriam Santos, then city treasurer, to be "da Mare" because he found her sexy. I do have to admit she is better looking than Richard M. Daley.

Of course if you put ears on my ass it would be better looking than "da Mare". I don't want a good looking mayor. I want a competent mayor. Is that asking too much?

I can get my "eye candy" on the internet or by walking around. I don't need it in a political leader.

Go Jesus, Go Jesus

I can't figure out why this video is not an internet hit. It is absolutely brilliant. Unlike me.

My "Film" of the Batman filming on Kenmore

With the fine production values I am so famous for.

The FCC Song

Velcome to da UPTOWN AVENGER


I BID YOU VELCOME

Well "What the Helen" is Kaput again. WTH himself decided to spend more time with his family. ME: all I got is the internet and the occasional hooker who wanders into my path between here and the Jewel. Very occasional as the neighborhood has improved. Sniffle. It used to be a full service "hood". Drugs, hookers, bangers,...........ahhhhhhhh......they are mostly gone.

Oh well only one appropriate way to start out this blog.